Patience is a Virtue

...and I am being given a great opportunity to practice it right now!

We are moving in a little less than two months, and we haven't taken a house-hunting trip, haven't found a place to rent, haven't spoken to a realtor, haven't booked any flights.  In fact, we don't even know yet how much money we'll have to spend on rent.  You might think, "Wow, that's pretty soon.  Shouldn't you guys be getting some of that going?"

Yeah.  That's what I think, too.

You also might have observed that those two months between now and our move include two major holidays.

Yeah.  I observed that, too.

But alas, as we had been warned, the cogs of HR turn slowly, and we are still waiting for financial approval to move forward with any logistics.  So, in the meantime, we've been doing everything we can think of to prepare without actually spending any money:

• We've researched online real estate websites and narrowed down our search to our favorite few areas.
• We've looked into train, tube and bus passes and formed a tentative plan of how best to cover our transportation in London.
• We've looked up bed-and-breakfasts in the most gorgeous parts of the UK and driving times to get there from London.  (Okay, so that wasn't exactly necessary.  But it is fun!) :o)
• We've set up the shipping for our dogs.  (See last post.)
• We've donated tons of extra stuff from our home in preparation for the down-size.
• We've researched churches, grocery stores, parks, train and tube maps, Bible studies, pubs, local points of interest, and so much more, to get a feel for what daily life might look like once we arrive.

I know that we'll get our approval before we know it, and everything will somehow get done when we need it.  I know that if all else fails, we can live in a hotel for a while in London while we find a flat.  I know that not everything with this move is going to go perfectly, and that's part of the adventure.  And I know that no matter what, we are in this together, and we are going to have rich stories and memories to hold onto!

But really, HR.  You could hurry up a little.  :o)

The Business of Dog-Shipping

Hi, we're Brinkley and Buster!  Will you let us into England, please?

When Adam and I first found out about the possibility of moving to London, we immediately thought of our dogs.  We are both total dog people, both grew up with dogs, and those two cutie pies in the picture are our best buddies.  We had heard horror stories about trying to get dogs into the UK -- months of quarantine, shots, endless paperwork, and the sobering truth that many owners simply choose to give away their dogs rather than face the hassle of moving with them.

There was no way we were going to do that; our dogs are part of the family!  So we set to work figuring out how to make this happen.

First of all, we discovered that the mandatory six-month quarantine was a thing of the past.  The whole point of these crazy regulations is that England is an island and has no rabies, so they are very careful to make sure no dogs coming into the country have any symptoms of rabies.  A couple of years ago they changed the rules so that the six months of waiting between rabies shot and England could happen in the home country INSTEAD of quarantine.  So the process would look like this: rabies shot, wait six months, blood test confirming negative for rabies, Welcome to the UK!

Well, we just found out for sure that we're moving to London about a week ago, and we have to be there in January!  Oh no!  THANKFULLY, the regulations are changing again in January - no six-month wait if you're coming from an approved country, one of which is the U.S.  Whew!  So we'll be able to bring them immediately!

Oh, I wish that were the only concern.  The biggest hurdle now is the paperwork -- the confusing, extensive paperwork to get them through UK customs.  If you get there, and any of the paperwork is missing or wrongly worded, they end up in quarantine.  If the airport microchip reader can't find their microchips, they end up in quarantine.  If they lick the customs agent, they end up in quarantine.  (Okay, I made that last part up.  But seriously, it seems that ridiculous at times.)

After mildly freaking out about this for several hours, we decided to enlist the help of a pet relocation service.  Didn't know those existed till a few days ago!  For a (quite hefty) fee, they arrange all the vet appointments and approvals prior to shipping, book the flights for our dogs, pick them up at our house in Katy, get them through customs on both the U.S. and UK side, take care of all the paperwork, and deliver them to our new flat in London.  Is it pricey?  Yes.  Do I feel a little silly for not being able to handle this myself?  Oh yes.  Worth it?  Definitely!

We are just starting the process of making all the arrangements for their big move.  Brinkley and Buster, you sure are high-maintenance and expensive, but we love you!!

Big Changes

In the past 9 months since I've blogged, there have been some big changes to our lives, and obviously some big changes to the blog!  Yes, folks, it's true - in a couple of months we are being transferred to London.  After a long, tough year, what better way to start off with a clean slate and a new adventure?

Because of these big changes coming in our lives, I've been re-inspired to begin blogging again.  I figure I'll mostly blog about the move and cultural changes, but I'll probably throw in some other random topics when I feel like it.

So how do I feel about moving across the world? Right now I am thrilled, terrified, ecstatic, sad, nervous and a whole lot of other emotions.  In some ways, I feel like we are only baby ex-pats, since the differences between the UK and the US are not that great.  But the worry of the unknown creeps in, and I begin to wonder how difficult this will be.

One thing that comforts me is knowing we are doing this the easy way.  Adam's company is taking care of practically everything; we basically only have to direct which stuff goes to London and which goes to storage, pick out a house, and voila, move accomplished.  I know there's more to it than that, but really, it could be much worse.

Well I don't want this to be too long, so I'll save specific topics for other posts.  Long time no see, blog world!

Hello friends and family,

Please read the following updates from Adam of our journey the last couple of weeks. I am so happy you've all helped me chronicle the miraculous lives of our two precious sons on this blog. We are overjoyed that they are having a blast in Heaven hanging out with their namesakes. What a wonderful God we serve.

Love, Erin

January 24, 2011

Hi Everyone.

First and foremost, both of us want to thank ALL of you from the bottom of our hearts for your overwhelming outpouring of support and generosity. We are truly blessed with fantastic friends, family, and co-workers. We've felt incredibly loved and are so very grateful for your continued prayers and encouragement! So thank you, thank you, thank you all!

But, on with the updates...

After 8 days in the hospital, we got to come home today!! Since about noon we've been back at the house, busily building a nest for Erin to enjoy for the next 4 1/2 weeks. Although we were a little bit nervous to leave the comfort of constant supervision at the hospital, within the first few hours back we're now appreciating just how mentally relaxing it is to be back in familiar surroundings. Having our own food, our own bed and, last but not least, our puppy dogs has really been uplifting and comforting all around. There's obviously a bit more work to do now that we're not getting every meal & snack delivered, beds changed, bathrooms cleaned, etc, but it's all very worth it :)

Erin is still feeling just great. Our prayers continue for no infections, no labor, and big happy healthy boys many many weeks from now! And on that note, now's as good a time as any to let you all know we've decided on names for the boys. We'd had a pretty good idea for a few weeks, but this last week's events have solidified our choices. They'll be Elijah ("Eli") Walter Bortka and Ezekiel ("Zeke") Wade Bortka. I've always been inspired by both (the Biblical) Elijah and Ezekiel for their outrageously strong and outspoken faith in God. And we've matched them specifically now according to their roles in this new chapter of our pregnancy: Baby A, who lost his fluid, will be Zeke. Ezekiel was called upon to go through incredible personal hardship, preach God's word, and live out his faith in a very hostile environment. We like to think that the same can be said already for Baby Zeke! Elijah, although also living and prophesying in some dicey situations, was called to be a fierce leader and inspire those around him. We also love that one of his very first recorded acts was imploring God to heal a sick child. We know that our Baby Eli can be the leader and protector his brother needs right now. The middle names, Walter and Wade, are our paternal grandparents, and we are excited to carry some family traditions & names down with the next Bortka generation.

We're so grateful for 8 miraculously uneventful days under our belts, and we continue to pray for weeks and weeks of more miracles. But for now, each hour that passes is a blessing :)

Thank you all again for your incredible support. May God Bless you all.

With much love,

The Bortka Family

January 28, 2011

Hi Everyone.

Again, I'd like to start by thanking each of you for the incredible and overwhelming support we've received these last few weeks. I know I'm sounding like a broken record, but we count ourselves as so blessed to have such amazing friends & family to walk and pray with us on this journey; I really don't have words to express our gratitude. So thank you, and praise God for the wonders He works through support of a community.

Our journey has now entered a 3rd chapter: Back at the Hospital. We were so happy to go home on Monday afternoon, and were able to relax a bit and soak up some peaceful time in familiar surroundings, sleeping in our own bed and petting the dogs :) Late Tuesday night however, we had some changes with the babies that caused us to call and come back to St. Luke's. It all felt very surreal, because we went through the same routine on being admitted, being told we were probably going to deliver that night, but in the end (Praise God!) settling into a stable waiting state, where we remain today. Although the risk for both Zeke & Eli's life and Erin's health has gone up, we've been praying continuously for God to speak to us through the doctors' wisdom. And for the moment, we are so thankful that the doctors are still comfortable with letting us choose to wait and pray. So with each hour that passes, we give thanks for health and continuation of those 2 strong little heartbeats, but pray above all that no matter how light or dark the journey gets, that we can walk completely in God's will. We can agree with Paul that:

"All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort." (2 Corinthians 1:3)

So we know we can trust that when we walk in His will He will give us comfort that only our Father can give. It is through His strength alone that we can walk this journey we never anticipated. So for now we wait, and are truly thankful for each minute, hour, and day that passes. We're now up to 19 weeks and 2 days (12 days of it on bedrest!) of experiencing the miracle that is the growth of two little souls, and are so privileged to so intimately and privately know our beautiful boys.

Again, I can't thank you all enough for your unflinching support and prayers. Know that they are heard and felt.

On a practical details note, we're back at that same ward at St. Luke's, but for now emotionally it's been best to keep visitors to just immediate family. I thank you all for understanding, but please know that we are blessed by the emails, texts, posts, and all kinds of support we've received. It lifts our spirits every time and helps make each day a little brighter. I've loved adding more and more people to our contact list :)

God bless you all!

The Bortka Family

January 31, 2011

Dearest Friends & Family,

Words continue to fail to express how grateful we will always be for the tremendous love and encouragement you all have shown during these last weeks. So again, I’ll say “Thank You” from the bottom of our hearts, but know your support has made an impossible situation so much easier to bear, and that our “Thank You” falls woefully short of our true gratitude.

We count ourselves so blessed to have spent 3 years hoping for, and 19 weeks and 5 days witnessing the unequalled miracle that is the creation of two precious lives.

After so long, it broke our hearts when our precious boys spent their last minutes in this world with us this weekend.

It is a situation that if you asked objectively how it should go, we should feel not only devastated, but more intensely angry, feel like victims, and feel like statistics. We should be overcome with the “Why?”s. We should feel inconsolable. In a word, we should feel lost.

But though we are grieving, though we are heartbroken, WE ARE NOT LOST! For we know:

“The Word gave life to everything that was created, and his life brought light to everyone. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness can never extinguish it” (John 1:4-5)

And:

“Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world”. (John 16:33)

We have shed more tears in the last few weeks than we could have ever imagined. And we know beyond any doubt that’s ok and is critical and needed to deal with our grief. But, just as importantly, we have been lit with a passion and fierce confidence in the word of God unprecedented in either of our lives. We have also seen what we believed was a strong marriage blossom into a more beautiful and steadfast relationship than either of us ever thought was possible.

Zeke and Eli will always be our sons, and dwell deep within our hearts for the rest of our lives. And though we wished so badly to watch them grow up and know them here on Earth, we know that their perfect unblemished selves are living now with their heavenly Father, helping prepare a place for our whole family to spend eternity knowing each other.

I got to share earlier what I think we will remember as the most important verse we’ve embraced during this time: “All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort.” (2 Corinthians 1:3)

We have felt that comfort wrapped around us so tightly the last few days, and we know we could not be functioning right now without that supreme comfort. However, as we now enter a new chapter of our lives, we also take heart in the continuation of those words from Paul:

“He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.” (2 Corinthians 1:4)

We will never forget this time in our lives. We will spend the rest of our days simultaneously grieving for and celebrating the new eternal life of our precious perfect angels. But while Erin and I are still walking and talking in this world, our prayer will be that through all of this, we can fulfill God’s will in that we can accept his comfort and, through benefit of our experience, share it freely and liberally with everyone around us!

So we thank you for your prayers, we thank you for your sympathy and grief. It helps us bear this load to know we have so many other shoulders pitching in. But although I never wish it for anyone, I do hope that if you find yourself in a time of grief, you take comfort first in God’s strength, and know that you have ears to listen and shoulders to cry on in the Bortka house :)

A thousand blessings for all of you,

Adam, Erin, Zeke, & Eli

P.S. The gifts, notes, acts of kindness, and prayers from all of you have been more than enough to bless us many lifetimes over! But, because some folks have asked… we’re still working out details on some funds/causes that would be grateful to accept donations or gifts in memory of our boys (although those that feel compelled to send flowers, know that Erin loves them oh so much!). We will probably be going home tomorrow (for now we’re still at St. Luke’s).

When she’s finished recuperating, we will be happy to host visitors. But we appreciate your help in keeping things quiet around the house for the first few days back. I’ll certainly let everyone know when we’re up for it. Again, we love you all more than you ever imagined!

A New and Challenging Chapter

Hi friends and family! I know many of you have heard the news already, but we want to make sure we reach everyone possible. Adam typed up an email explaining our current situation, and I've pasted it into this post below. My plan is to continue to update this blog regularly with our progress, both to keep everyone updated who is interested, and to capture every miraculous moment in our sweet boys' lives! Please read on, and I promise I (or Adam) will keep you updated as best we can. We love you all!

Hi Everyone.

I'm so sorry we didn't get to talk to everyone in person, but I thought at least we'd send a note to get everyone up to speed.

On Sunday night, Erin's water broke on one of the babies. She's at about 18 weeks, which is way too early to safely deliver any babies. At the time, Erin was having some contractions, and we were told we probably were going to have to deliver both babies that night. Obviously that was devastating news. However, praise God, the contractions stopped quickly later that night, and since then, she's been very stable. So although Baby A lost his fluid, it's still possible for her to carry both babies all the way to a normal delivery date. Our biggest risks at this point would be if she went into labor, or if she got an infection. But she's not had any contractions for the last 3 days, and she shows no signs of infection - in addition to being on lots of IV antibiotics. Life is going to be hour-to-hour, day-to-day for the Bortkas for a long time, but we know beyond any doubt that the situation is in God's hands, and with that we find comfort. As most of you know, our entire pregnancy has been miraculous and we feel so blessed to have experienced 18 straight weeks of miracles so far! We're just praying now that we get to see many more :)

If Erin continues to be perfectly stable, they'll send us home on Monday for continued bedrest. We'll be at home until she gets to 23 weeks, at which point we'd come back to the hospital, hopefully for a long time :) Right now we're at St. Luke's Episcopal Hospital downtown in the Medical Center, and are so happy to be surrounded by a medical practice that specializes in high risk multiple births, and next door to one of the world's best neo-natal programs at Texas Children's!

We are so blessed to have such amazing friends & family that have been so supportive. We certainly love having your prayers to help through the journey ahead. For now, we've loved getting supportive notes from people, as phone conversations have been tricky buried deep in the concrete hospital. And although we are so honored to have folks wanting to come visit and are happy to host at our new downtown address, I'd like to ask that if you're going to come, please call, text, or write to me ahead of time (281-202-8228, & please use my gmail address at abortka@gmail.com) to double check that we're in a good state to have visitors at that moment. And, if you can't make it this week but still want to show support, we're going to have lots of time at home for the next month or so and would be happy to see people then :)

So again, for now we're doing really good. Erin is stable and healthy, both babies are healthy, and God's firmly in control!

I'll try to keep sending out updates on a regular basis, or as things change. Erin loves hearing from people at ebortka@gmail.com or texts at 281-633-6830.

We love you all, God bless you for your support in our time of need.

"We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed" 2 Corinthians 4:8-9

With much love,

Adam & Erin

Getting a little carried away...

Sorry I've delayed in keeping everyone updated! Since we found out about our boys, I have been going nonstop to try and get ready for their arrival. We've picked out bedding, narrowed down furniture choices, picked a stroller, found a diaper bag (it's embarrassing how much shopping I did for that), and started a registry. Add to that a full week of work and an activity every single night, and I am absolutely worn out.

I'm not sure why - maybe it's the "nesting phase," maybe my natural tendency to get carried away, but I'm having a really hard time slowing down and pacing myself with this baby stuff. I want everything to be ready NOW, despite the fact that we have almost five months until our due date! I'm also having a hard time relinquishing control of anything. Adam offered to do the big closet cleanout and room rearrangement that's necessary before we can set up the nursery, and I straight up told him, "No, I want to do it, because I don't think you'll do it the way I want you to." Wha?! This is not normally like me; I promise!!

After a week of completely wearing myself out, I may be starting to learn my lesson (with the help of my very wise husband). I don't have to do everything right now, CAN'T do everything myself, and need to accept help when it is offered. It's okay that I don't know what the heck to do with a breast pump, that I don't know how I'll manage feeding two babies, that we haven't yet decided which car seats to buy. I need to stop attempting to steal control from God and just rest in the knowledge that He will take care of us and our baby boys!

A couple of side-notes from the week:

-Our boys are 5 inches long from head to bottom (and my stomach shows it!).

-I THINK I may be feeling some movement, but I can't be sure yet.

-For fun, I added up the cost we can expect to spend on diapers for our boys through potty training. A conservative estimate is $8000.

-My appetite is picking up, and so is my weight. That pesky little milestone I was worrying about a few weeks ago? Yeah, long gone.

-We're taking family photos with Adam's family tomorrow. I'm hoping a bulky sweater and artfully-placed scarf will hide the fact that I'll be pregnant on his parents' wall for the next 10 years.

-My parents are moving down here in less than a month!

Boy Oh Boy!!

The results are in, and I have given away the news in the title - we are having 2 boys!!! I might as well start embarrassing them now; photo proof of their genders is shown below:

Adam and I were both honestly shocked at the outcome. We had somehow both convinced ourselves that we would be having at least one girl. We also had both had dreams that we were having one of each, but I guess you can never really know until you know!

Now that the initial shock has worn off, we are both so thrilled. We are very excited to jump into the world of blocks, trucks, legos, and sports; it's going to be quite an adventure! We can't wait to really begin getting ready in earnest - decorating the nursery, registering, etc. It can all really start. Now we just have to decide on names...

In other news, I'm just trucking along! I FINALLY passed up that weight milestone I was struggling with; I have a resolution to stop worrying about it so much and just do my best. The babies are both still ahead of schedule in size, and everything is going great.

Happy New Year, all - 2011 will be the year of the BOYS!!